Today wasn't so good 
I don't know how to explain it...It's like I wasn't me but I was watching me (If you understand what I mean by that). It's confusing 
It's like someone else was controlling my feelings and I could only watch as everything was happening.
All day people kept talking to me as if I was stupid. That really did bother me 
It's like they're all in this little group together and they purposely talk down to me because I'm on the outside and I'm just looking in on them like some sort of freak. That really does not help my little 'problem' with paranoia
I came home and locked myself in my room again. I sat against the door just crying...I just don't want to be around people right now 
It's like if I'm around people then I'll have to put on this facade, all the while feeling so utterly paranoid and shit about myself I hate this. I hate the fact that I'm still locked in my room on my own worrying about what everyone thinks of me. Why should I care 
I shouldn't! I know I shouldn't....and yet I still do. What's wrong with me
larsnxd
) Its what makes us human, I guess.
Why pretend to be happy when you're not, sugar? You're not a freak, lots of people get angry and sad for all sorts of reasons and no reasons at all. I do sometimes and I wonder why.
Why should you care about what other people think of you? You are you, and if ppl dont like that, then thats their misfortune.
Try and keep your chin up sweetheart x.