Well I finally got the date for my interview at college :>> I got hardly any time to get all my shit together for it though >:( I seriously need someone to do it for me as I cannot organise anything to save my fucking life. And plus I am too lazy to find everything I need for it :))

Certificates? What the heck do I need certificates in my personal file thing for? :??: I don't even have any bloody certificates! I have not achieved anything, as my lack of certificates shows. It annoys me how everyone else who has gotten the date for their interviews has already sorted out their personal file and they've filled it with bloody certificicates!!! How the heck is everyone else organised?! I honestly wish I knew.

Well I feel like shit again :'( I hate it how someone can say something and it'll automatically make me feel like crap. I'm completely pathetic. I fucked up and now my friends are happy I feel fucking terrible for feeling like this. I'm very very selfish, I know I am, but I can't help it. I do actually try not to be but it never seems to work :( I hate, well more like 'strongly dislike' my ex-friends, but in a way if they wanted to be friends again I know that I'd accept without hesitation because I am weak and pathetic. I just don't like the fact that I'm so concerned with what they think of me still. I know I shouldn't be and I'm such a dickhead for caring.
>:XX>:XX>:XX>:XX>:XX
I wish I never fucked up, because if I didn't then people wouldn't hate me and I wouldn't hate myself :**:
See what I mean about me being selfish? ME ME ME! that's all I 've been fucking talking about >:XX I get myself angry >:XX